Top Offensive Pickup Lines
by Gloria Liven
Guaranteed to offend her!

There are so many pickuplines out there that are quite offensive (yet funny)... here are the worst offensive pickup lines I've heard of! Thanks to everyone who submitted their worst lines; We can always use more, so email us!

• You know what would look great on you? Me!
• Congratulations, you just won a prize! You get to spend the entire night with me!
• Nice shoes. Wanna f***?
• I'll show you my wand if you'll let me see your chamber of secrets.
• My name's Pogo; Wanna jump on my stick?
• Are you free tonight, or will it cost me?
• Let's play house! You can be the door, and I'll slam you all night long.
• Do you know the difference between a hot dog and a blowjob? No? Well I'd love to take you to lunch....
• You know what would make this conversation way better? If we were both naked.
• I'd like to screw your brains out, but looks like someone else did it first.
• Do you clean your panties with Windex? Because I can see myself in them.
• Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like spaghetti, let's go srew
• I lost my bed. Can I use yours tonight?
• Excuse me, do you wanna F***, or should I apologize?
• Hi, I'm a necrophiliac; Are you good at playing dead?
• Will you give me your phone number or do I have to stalk you?
• Hi, My name is _______; remember it 'cause you'll be screaiming it all night long!
• I can't find my puppy, can you help me? I think he went into a cheap hotel room.
• Was your dad a gardener? Because you have amazing melons!
• As long as I have a face, you have somewhere to sit.
• Want to play leapfrog naked?
• Excuse me, do you have sex with strangers? No, well then let me introduce myself.
• I have Skittles in my pants; Wanna taste the rainbow?
• I'm new here and you're the prettiest sight I've seen. Could I get a tour of your body?
• Hi. I'm horny. You'll do.
• If you don't want to have sex with me, can I do it with you?
• I've got a condom with your name on it.
• Come one, let's find out what our children will look like!
• You look like my type, except for your clothing: it's still on.
• You're ugly, but you intrigue me.
• You look pretty good now that I'm pretty drunk.
• So what will you be making me for breakfast?
• Excuse me, are you fondling those breasts? No, well can I?
• Is that dress felt? Would you like it to be?
• I'd love to melt in your mouth, not in your hand.
• I'm Irish. Would you like some Irish in you?
• Do you like to sleep? So do I! We should sleep together sometime.
• Let's have a party and invite your pants to come down!
• You, me, naked. Interested?
• Excuse me, if you've lost your virginity, can I have the box it came in?
• You're on my list of things to do tonight
• Your clothes would look great on my floor.
• Guess what, I'm gonna have sex tonight? (With who?) That depends, what are you doing later?
• Cute jeans. Do you think I could get in them?
• So is it easier to fit into that tight dress, or have me get you out of it?
• Do you work at Subway? Because you gave me a footlong.
• Nice pair of legs. What time do they open?
• I'm not a horse, but I'd let you ride me.
• I want to spend the rest of my night with you.
• My penis is cold, want to help me warm it up?
• I'm looking for treasure, can I check your chest?
• Hi, my name is _________, and I'll be your sex toy tonight.
• Try to guess what number I'm thinking of. You loose! Take off your clothes.

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